How to improve emotional resilience
Emotional resilience is directly linked to stress and the way in which we use and look after our energy. Here are four ways you can improve your emotional resilience, and in turn lower your stress levels. These tips are simple but effective and can be used before, during or after a stressful situation.
Sealing your energy
First, let’s talk about ‘sealing’ our energy so we are not at the mercy of external influences, and an effective visual to support you with this.
The personal space that I mean is the space immediately around you. And it is an energetic field. Sometimes we call it our aura.
Sometimes we think of it literally just as personal space – we feel when somebody intrudes into that space, perhaps physically, or with their emotions. In doing so, their energy field (which is full of how they’re feeling, what they’re thinking, what their experiences have been) interacts with your energy field, where all your feelings and aspirations and dreams and experiences are held.
And sometimes there is an energetic clash, which makes us feel very uncomfortable.
So my first tip for managing your personal space is to learn how to seal your energy field so that you’re not at the mercy of what other people are bringing into it.
And the way that I like to do that is; I like to imagine myself in a protective bubble of light. It’s such a simple tip, but a very effective one.
I like to make that bubble of light, a beautiful rose pink, because I want it to have a very kind and compassionate energy.
But if you’re going to be around someone you know you’ll feel more threatened by, you can make a shield out of an image of indestructible lead, or your bubble could be made out of mirror to be more defensive.
The main idea is that we take responsibility for our own personal space.
With people we know, like, trust and love we often don’t even give it thought when we let them in because we already know them. We are already vibrating at a similar wavelength. So it feels really good.
It’s not even that it feels comfortable. It feels actively good.
But we need to know how to manage ourselves when we’re less sure, or when we know that it’s going to be a challenging situation.
Clearing your energy
Let’s turn our attention to clearing our energy with a simple action to clear emotions, thoughts, memories and difficult experiences which you’re ready to let go of. Hint: it’s a task that you already do!
One of my absolute preferred ways to clear my energy field is when I take a shower, to imagine that the water is cleaning my body, but it is also cleaning my energy field so that I’m cleaning both physically and energetically. And what are we cleaning off?
We’re cleaning off emotions, thoughts, memories, difficult experiences, that you’re ready to let go of now.
And also those intrusions from other people so that you don’t have to carry around their weight of experiences or expectations too.
Think of a bank account
Here is one of the most important tips that I could give you. It’s an idea about how our emotional resilience is like a bank account. In order to withdraw money, you must have funds in your account – the same goes for your emotional resilience, and I share how you can build up your ‘bank balance’.
The idea is that we get used to thinking of our emotional resilience like a bank account.
So just like a financial bank account, if you want to make withdrawals, you have to have deposits as well.
You have to have money in the bank, in order to be able to spend that money. Well, we have to have emotional resilience in the bank in order to spend our emotional resilience.
And so what we need to begin to get good at is putting those deposits in.
And a deposit, in essence, is something that makes you feel good. In order to do this, you need to get really getting good at noticing what lifts you up and what makes you feel good, what makes you feel confident, compassionate, achieving strong kind, all of those feel-good experiences. You notice them and bank them through noticing them.
You can also add an anchor – a physical cue.
For example, you could press your finger and thumb together tightly as you replay that good feeling. And by repeating that, you can recreate that feeling when you need it.
There’s plenty more out there about anchoring.
The key idea here is we get good at banking experiences that make us feel good. And that grows your bank account balance so that when you inevitably need to make a withdrawal, you have something to withdraw from.
Managing your energy
I want to talk about managing your energy. You may have already noticed who, what and where drains you of energy and what might do the opposite and help you feel energised. This is a reminder to become more aware of this and offer advice on what you can do to better manage your energy.
Let’s begin to look at energy as something that we direct intentionally. And with this, I’m asking; where does your energy drain away?
Are there certain people are there certain places, or certain tasks, which you know, drain you of your energy?
If so, it’s time to start working out how you can limit your exposure.
Sometimes you can cut something out or even at times, we might need to mindfully cut a person out of our life.
A lot of the time, we can simply limit the exposure or be really creative about how we spend time with that person or in that place or on that task.
Get really good at choosing where your energy goes so that you’ve got more energy for the things and the people that you love.
I hope these tips help, and I’m always here if needed.
Do you struggle with managing stress? Perhaps you would like help with feeling more emotionally resilient? Then book a coaching session with me here and we will get it figured out.